Here's Paris' great week:
Paris' album sold a paltry 75,000 copies -next week sales to go down more than 50%
Cher's son Elijah Blue claims that Paris gave him an STD (we don't doubt it)
Paris dissed her ex-friend Tara Reid while trying to get into the club Hyde in LA
Paris wants to go to outer space on Richard Branson's rocket ship
We're all praying this spaceship gets built immediately!!! Just go away!!!
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